Oswin St. George. Coach of the West Carrillon Point junior basketball team. He hadn't particularly wanted this job, but he overheard Stacy from accounting say one day by the water cooler that her son was thinking of learning how to play basketball. She was a single mother. He seized the opportunity.
Today was the 2010 West Carrillon Point Nudibranchs' first game. Oswin felt he had prepared them well; he had some experience with this game after all, as a proud former member of the 1979 West Carrillon Point Nudibranchs.
Oswin thought back to his seventh birthday. His father had bought him a new basketball and brand new plus sized shorts, complete with matching Air Gordons. Of course, he attended the first few practices with an enthusiasm only a naïve seven year old could have.
“Put me in the next game, coach. Please?”
Young Oswin's opportunity came a few weeks later, and he waddled out onto the court, eyeing the opposing team. They didn't look too scary, he outsized all of them by at least a factor of two. Those East Carrillon Point Pink Fairy Armadillos were going down.
His team was down 22 points. Ten seconds left on the clock. Oswin's vision blurred, his legs felt more like pudding than usual. The ball bounced off the rim, and he felt himself lurch forward, in a valiant final effort to save the match.
It took them a few minutes to notice the second player who had been trapped and engulfed under him. The ball was never found.
Then reality came crashing back down on him, harder than he'd come crashing down on that other player, as a stray ball knocked him into two sodas and a crowd of parents in the bleachers.
He hated basketball.
1 comment:
this is hilarious! i love the mascot, you have no idea, it's a great one. :) also, pink fairy armadillos--they're fearsome beasts. don't mess with 'em. xD
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